2009 Comes to a Close

All afternoon has been spent chasing around a rambunctious 16 month old that now really does get into everything.  I thought it was bad before with just the climbing on furniture, tables, getting at my computer, pulling out all the shoes etc.  But lately she has learned how to open the dishwasher.  We try to keep it latched as that would seem the obvious solution, but the little smartie pants has figured out how to unlock it.  Then today, holy shit, the oven door. 

What's Your Motivation?

Motivation:
An emotion, desire, physiological need, or similar impulse that acts as an incitement to action.

The word motive produces images of serial killers, rapists, a general picture of all things criminal.  For criminals have motives for the bad things they do.  They were abused by a mother figure, have a total disrespect for women and want them all to suffer, or have some superiority complex...or maybe they are just really broke so they rob a 7-Eleven for the quick cash, or really thirsty so they hold up a liquor store, (although they could have bought the liquor with the money they stole from the 7-Eleven). 
We always hear the word motive in this context so it's no wonder when we think of someone having a motive for the things they do, it instills negative images. 

Treasure the Goodness in Every Moment

There is good to be found in everything we do or everything that happens to us.  Even when it seems hopeless there has to be something good.

The snot drizzles from her little nose and I hear her snoring at night.  If only she would take that stupid soother out of her mouth she might be able to breathe better but each time I try she wakes.  At least the loose snot means she's getting better right?  With every swipe of the tissue that is just a little less snot to capture.  We have been pretty lucky though...she is rarely sick and it's been months since I have had to chase after her with the tissue to collect the slimy mess.

The Brain of a Man ("simple" yet lovable)

I love my husband to death but sometimes he seriously drives me crazy.  It's not his fault.  He can't help it that he is full of testosterone and whatever other hormones make up the human male, making him the way he is.  I think there is some kind of chemical in a man's brain that makes them either lazy or stupid. 

Most Memorable Moments of 2009

I thought I would create my own memorable moments list of things that happened in 2009.  Not that my life is all that exciting but there has to be some things that top the charts.  It's nice to see what you can remember from the last year or what you forget.

January:

• I think it was pretty cold this month.  Really not remembering anything exciting or interesting that happened to us or anything that we might have done. 
• Julianne might have rolled over this month.  I can't remember for sure when that happened.

Christmas #2

Now the second Christmas that the little one has experienced, this is a huge difference from last year.  Still a babe wrapped in swaddling clothing last year, this time she was able to attempt unwrapping her own gifts.
For the most part, Julianne would open one and play with that, not even thinking about all the others that were left.  And there were a lot for her.  After all, it's all about the kids right? 

Many gifts we still had to help her with but by the time she was done, she was getting right into it, so started to open the ones that weren't for her.  Almost completely opened one of her Uncle Tim's gifts.  There was very little paper left on it by the time he arrived to open it himself. 

All in all, it was a good day.  A good experience, memory, for the record books.  Too bad Julianne won't remember it, but there will many more to come that she will remember.

So tired, can't even muster the energy to write anything of length.  Nothing more than the day was great.  Will write more tomorrow.

Hope you all had a great day and got lots of turkey.

Cheers

BTW---Fudge was good but WAAAAAY too sweet.  Will have to modify recipe to see if it can be made a little less sweet.  Also, extra note, wax paper sucks.  Use margerine or butter to grease pan. 

Full of Sugary Goodness

I did it.  For the first time in my life I made fudge.  Ha.  Not that it's a great accomplishment or anything cause it's really not all that hard to do.  Don't even have to turn on the oven.  But do have to turn on stove and that could be dangerous. 
It remains to be seen how it will turn out.  It's now sitting nestled in the fridge, going through the cooling stage.  T- 3 hours. 
When I was a kid, at Christmas my grandpa would often make fudge and it had to be the best thing

Holy Moly...2 more sleeps

Only two more sleeps until the big day.  No more sleeps if I don't sleep for the next couple of days.  Highly unlikely though as I have been incredibly tired the last week.  Perhaps unusually tired considering my normal sleeping pattern.  Could be the festive season is taking its toll on me or it could be that because I normally don't sleep all that well that it's finally caught up with me.  Whatever the reason, I know it will be two more sleeps before Christmas Day.

3 More Sleeps...

And I still don't have all my shopping done yet.  Sheesh.  So much for having everything done by the end of November.  But I will pull myself up and go to get the last couple of things soon.  Hopefully today.  Plus I still have to do the dinner shopping.  My plan was to do that tomorrow but I might do it today.  We will see.  It's starting to snow AGAIN.  It snowed all day yesterday.  Looks like we are going to have that white Christmas afterall.

I have more to say today but not enough time to write so I will post again later maybe.  Or leave you all in suspense. 

Cheers

Monday Again?

Is it really Monday again?  Already?  Where does the time go?  Well it's the start of a new week and hopefully a better week.  So far, Julianne is in a good mood.  She slept really good.  Actually she has been sleeping pretty good for the last few days.  She went down around 8pm last night and didn't wake up until close to 10am this morning so I would say that's a success.  She didn't eat much for breakfast though.  Sometimes the amount she eats worries me but she seems to be doing just fine.  Obviously she is getting enough.  Just eats like a bird.  And she eats often so I am sure she's just fine. 
I think she's getting used to not having a soother during the day.  Now it's just a matter of getting it away from her at night.  I tried to go take it away from her the other night while she was sleeping, but as soon as I pulled it out of her mouth she sat straight up in bed.  Not entirely awake but enough to know what I was doing I think.  So I gave it back to her and left it alone.  I think I might have to go the route of poking the little pinholes in it.  Although it's not entirely necessary that I take it away from her now.  I will probably leave it for a few more days.  Maybe in January I will progress to the next step.

So the staff Christmas party is complete and it wasn't all that bad.  The food was good and there was lots to talk about.  Namely the 50 something Janis Joplin-prostitute wannabe.  What the (*$^)!  Who dresses like that?  Long jet black hair parted straight down the middle and wild enough that many a bird could have found a safe haven among the mattes.  You couldn't even see her face behind all that hair.  And that was nothing compared to what she was wearing!  Black, bell bottomed strappy dress that was at least 2 sizes too small.  Her breasts were so squashed into that dress I swear she was trying to perform a self-mammogram.  I felt sorry for the little duo as they tried to break free, trying to catch any possible breath they could.  It was so short in the back that her bra was ALL you could see.  And of course the dress was WAY too short.  I couldn't tell you what kind of shoes she was wearing as I was too shocked with the rest of the getup.  Rumour has it she's trying to find herself a 'decent' man but come on lady, do you really think that is going to attract the kind of man you're wishing for?  Good grief!  Some people will never get it.  From the looks of it, what you're offering, most men have to pay for.
Sorry, I don't normally talk about people like this but it was definitely a sight that I just couldn't get over. 
However, the highlight of the night was the awards.  Employee of the Year went to none other than....wait for it...drumroll please....my husband. Well deserved for sure.  And the nice monetary bonus that came with the glory was appreciated.  So I guess this was one party that wasn't all that bad.
One thing that really gets to me though, are the people that show such a lack of respect for the company they work for that they show up looking like they just rolled out of bed.  Most of these people were young men though.  Not that that's any excuse but it explains a lot.  You could at least not look like a hoodlum.  There were some I swear must have been packing something under that hoody.  It's possible that it's not a blatant disrespect for the company per se but a lack of respect for themselves.  But that's a totally different issue.

Cheers.

6 more sleeps til Christmas.  The stockings are hung by the chimney with care...in hopes that someone will fill the fuzzy things.  Most of the shopping is done, just a couple more things to get and then of course all the fixings for our holiday dinner.  Then we are ready to go.
Julianne is happy the last couple of days.  Probably because Daddy is home but happy nonetheless.  I'll take it, no matter what the reason.
Arie's staff Christmas party is tonight.  Julianne is spending time with her Auntie so that we can go out and have a good time, kid free.  It will be a welcomed break.  Even though, staff Christmas parties are not my favourite thing to do.  The formalities that surround them can be so boring and then the fact that I don't know anyone at this particular one.  But personally I don't like my own staff parties either.  At least the ones of the past.  The best ones have been the informal parties, at a co-workers home where it is simply the old fashioned house party.  Now those are the good ones.  Drinks, food, laughs and no formal activities.  Oh I miss those days.

Until tomorrow.

Soothers Are For Babies

Julianne will be 16 months old on Christmas Day.  I did some research into the right time to discontinue her soother.  Or binky or whatever you may call it.  I call it a soother for that is what it is, or pacifier but that sounds too stuffy, like I am a super sophisticated woman living the high life.  Ha, whatever.  It's a soother to me.

Different articles recommended different times and different ways of doing it.  But the general concensus was that I could start anytime.  If it doesn't work now, try again later.  I kinda wanted to have it done before we begin to potty train her.

To wean off the bottle was pretty simple.  We just reduced her bottle to night time, just before bed and enforced the cup more regularly.  One day she seemed to decide on her own that she didn't want that night time bottle anymore.  So that was fine with me.  So I am hoping the same will happen with the soother.

We have reduced the soother to naptime and bedtime.  Soon I am going to start taking it away from her in the middle of the night or middle of naptime so she doesn't have it when she wakes up and see how that goes (although most of the time the soother is on the floor by morning so she doesn't have it anyways).

Now, there could be some connection between the elimination of the daytime soother and her "episodes".  So, if that's the case, it should pass.  But we had her in the car this evening to go shopping and on the way there and way back she didn't have it and we had no problems.  Usually by the time we are done shopping and driving home she is incredibly cranky and today she was oddly calm.  Coincidence, probably.

There are so many other suggestions out there on how to wean your child.  Some really good suggestions and some really cruel suggestions.  Like just taking it away and letting her suffer.  I don't think I could so that.  Not only is it painful to her to go cold turkey, it would be painful to us.  I imagine moreso that it has been.  I don't want to traumatize the poor kid.  I suppose it works for some, but I am not going there.
The other idea I really liked was to poke holes in the nipple end so that it deflates when she sucks on it.  Do this for a few days then cut the tip off so it's even worse.  As days pass, if she hasn't already given it up on her own, continue to remove small portions of the nipple until it's down to pretty much nothing.  The idea is that your child will give it up on their own.  I like the gradual aspect to this method and that the child is essentially making the decision to give it up.  Seems fair and allows the child to feel a little more grown  up and in control.

For now I will try this way and see what happens.  If it's like the bottle, then it won't be long.

Then comes potty time. 

Cheers.

A Picture Worth A Thousand Words

One of the most beautiful pictures I have seen in a long time!  Just wanted to share.

Resolutions...

I fear it's that time of year again where we vow to make New Year's resolutions only to fail miserably within the first week (or month for the truly dedicated) of the new year.

I gave up making resolutions as I admit I am one that usually barely makes the first week.  I prefer to set goals.  But not year long goals, just goals to be completed at my leisure.  Ok that's kind of defeating the purpose because in my set up there is no chance of failure unless I die too soon.  But then I am not around to know that I failed and feel guilty about it.  My loved ones could go on thinking, 'It's so sad, she didn't complete all the goals she set for herself.'  But they would get over it.  Of that I am sure.  Because really isn't about living each day of your life to the absolute fullest?  Maybe you would rather spend some much needed quality time with your family rather than go to the gym and work off that 25lbs you vowed to shed.  You just never know when your time is up.  Do the things you love and love the things you do.

There is nothing wrong though with setting a few personal goals.  I do it all the time.  Mostly with my writing but maybe it's time to set some goals for my life.

Stay tuned.

Stay Strong and Stay Calm

I think I finally have it figured out.  Julianne has not been going to bed very nicely for about the past week.  Well, she'll go to bed and lay there playing and talking to her animals for over an hour then gradually the talking turns into moaning or squealing, eventually turning into an all out scream, pretty much a temper tantrum.  Speaking of temper tantrums, I will get to that shortly.  Keep reading!

So normally when the crying begins we would get up and get her, give her a snack and put her back to bed and it worked like a charm.  Lately though, that has not been working. 

Due to some other recent events with her, I have come to realize she is just having a fit because she is not getting her own way.  So one night, we got her up but afterwards she wouldn't go back to bed.  I got fed up as I am sure most parents do and finally just left her in bed and let her cry it out.  Approximately 20 minutes later she was asleep.  Good, problem solved.  Well then the other night it did not work out so easily.  She screamed, after being in her bed for about an hour.  Finally catching on to what she was trying to do, this time I refused to take her out of bed.  I went and talked to her, which didn't work.  I tried sitting in the middle of the floor with my back to her (saw that on SuperNanny, but I think its actuallly meant for the child that won't stay in their REAL bed) and some light music which actually worked for awhile but of course as soon as I moved it started all again.  So finally I gave her a little snack, which she played with rather than eating it.  So I gave her a drink of water and voila! she layed down and went right to sleep. 

However, tonight I was not interested in dealing with the temperment problems or whatever you want to call it.  Soooo...she did not get a nap today.  She was tired earlier in the day and I did try and give her a nap but she wasn't interested in sleeping so I kept her up and no matter how tired I could tell she was getting, I didn't put her to bed until after supper.  And she went to sleep with NO problems whatsoever.  Yes she went down a little earlier than normal but if it means I get that much needed couple of hours of peace and quiet in the evening then so be it.  That's what I am going to do.

Now for the temper tantrums.  I think more fitting is Julianne's episodes.  She throws a fit if she does not get her own way.  Like if we don't let her climb on the kitchen table and play with Mommy's laptop.  Or after she has gone through so much trouble to remove that particular piece of garbage from the trash can, how dare we take it away from her.  Sometimes there is advanced warning...big pouty lip comes out followed by the tears, or we just get straight screaming and laying on the floor kicking and rolling and hitting if you dare to get too close to her.  What a treat! 

I had my first experience of an "episode" in public.  We were at the mall trying to get some Christmas shopping done and this time she wanted to walk by herself.  I should mention we got one of those kiddy harnesses for her so she could walk and we could hold on to her, but once she was in a big wide open space with so much room to run but held back by the harness, that was it, she wouldn't go anywhere except down on the floor.  And yet I remained calm.  I simply picked her up, carried to another store that actually had shopping carts and then it was all good.  That was until I wouldn't let her touch everything that we walked past. 

I did make it home, a little exhausted but unscathed for the most part.  I am hoping that this was just a matter of being hungry and tired but only time will tell.  Until then I am on a mission to do everything possible to break her of this early.  Namely just not giving in.  I have to stand my ground, after all, I am a lot taller than she is.  For now at least! 

Cheers!

The kids are sleeping and I am sitting her mostly alone, trying to decide what to write about today.  The Christmas tree lights shine and the coloured lights around the room give it a soft colourful glow.  I was thinking about writing about the true meaning of Christmas, but there are so many different opinions out there that it seemed misguided to only write about what I believe, what I have been raised to believe, and the beliefs I have adopted on my own. 
The only constant around Christmas is the spirit of giving to those less fortunate.  I actually did something the other day that I have never done.  I gave money to the Salvation Army.  I was in the grocery store and a man was standing by his red bucket. jingling his bells, and it just made  me think.  I strongly support the veterans on Remembrance Day but at Christmas I sometimes forget about those people out there less fortunate.  I am not well off by any means, but I have a roof over my head, food in the fridge, warm clothes to wear, and extra money to do some fun things.  My daughter has just about everything she needs, actually probably more than she needs and there are people out there that don't have any of the above mentioned items that we often take for granted.  So, I decided it was my time to give a little more.  I think about it every year but very often just don't take action.  When the weather gets really cold here, and it does get really cold, I think about the poor homeless people out there and how difficult it must be for them in these temperatures.  I want to do something but it seems overwhelming.  There are so many people that need help, where do you start, how do you decide who is more deserving? 
Last year I was going to donate some blankets and warm clothes to the homeless shelters but then I got to thinking, only about 1000 homeless people make it into the shelters each night, (that number may be off, it's probably even less) so what about the other 1000 that are huddled under stairs in back alleys, under bridges, in parks among the trees, with barely anything to cover them, trying desperately to stay out of the frigid cold.  I could not imagine a life like that and I am sure the vast majority of us couldn't either but the fact remains that it's out there whether we choose to acknowledge it or not. 
So I did my little bit and hope others will too.  In the spirit of Christmas.

Take the Gobble, Gobble Out of Christmas?

Arie wants roast beef for Christmas dinner.  Are you kidding me?  Christmas is time for turkey and stuffing and all the other great foods that go with the holidays, and he wants to go for something else.  It's total crazy talk. 
His argument is that it is so much work.  But for who?  Surely not for him.  And really how much work is it?  You make the stuffing, fill the birds butt and neck and toss it in the oven.  The oven does all the work. 
I have a solution though...if he's concerned about it being too much work for ME, guess what, he's gonna help me this year.  He doesn't know it yet but he will find out soon enough.  In roughly 240 hours, give or take a few hours.
Won't he be surprised. 

MERRY CHRISTMAS, or HAPPY HOLIDAYS, whichever you prefer.

I would have thought that the days of late or no showers would be gone.  You hear stories about mothers that just don't have the time to get cleaned up but I thought that was only with newborns or within the first year.  I was sadly mistaken.  As it turns out, the early days are much easier.  You can just put the baby in a bassinette or playpen and off you go, no worries of the little one escaping and you keep them just outside the bathroom door and you can still hear everything.  But as they grow older not only can they get into things when you're not around, and very quickly, but if you try to bring them in the bathroom with you, they try to climb in.  Actually the one time I tried this, months ago, Julianne kept pulling the shower curtain out of the bathtub, so not only was she soaked by the time I was done, so was the bathroom.  I will add, there are much easier ways to clean the bathroom.
So now, she is 15 months old and if I want the luxury of bathing I have to wait until she goes down for a nap, or get up way before she wakes up.  The problem there is that they are so unpredictable.  You never know when they will actually wake up or as of late, not take a daytime nap at all.  She doesn't like the playpen anymore so that has been out of the picture for quite so time.  It leaves me only with spongebaths, and I don't own a sponge.  So I must wait until Daddy gets home.  Ugh!  There has to be another way. 

So this is Sunday again.  It's a cold and blustery day, and when I say cold I really mean cold.  -28 to be exact and it's not looking any better for tomorrow.  There is some reprieve this week though.  By Wednesday we are supposed to be in the positive digits.
So cramped inside.  Julianne is cranky today.  Mostly because she can't do whatever she wants.  It's temper tantrum crankiness.  She was fine for most of the morning but she has learned how to climb on all of the furniture.  Her new favourite is the kitchen chairs.  But then she wants to climb on the kitchen table and we stop her and she gets mad.  Then I wouldn't let her have the camera and she got mad.  Even started throwing things.  So guess where she is now?  HA, mama wins again. Bed!  She's not complaining about that though so maybe she was just getting tired. 
I know I was.

The Phone Keeps Ringing

I am so tired of telemarketers and telephone surveys.  It's gotten to the point that if I don't recognize the phone number I won't answer the phone.  Or if it's an 800, 877 or 888 number, don't expect the phone to be answered. 
For the last week, I have been getting this one phone caller that always comes up as a Private Caller.  That's annoying too because I have some friends that come up as private caller, so do you answer or not.  The choice of late has been not.  If it's someone I know, they will leave a message.  If it's an important call, they will leave a message.  Well this one particular caller was not leaving a message and I was continually ignore it.  Then they started calling at ALL hours.  First mostly in the evening, then in the mid afternoon and then finally it started in the morning.  Give me a break.  You would think if the phone is not answered after a few days of calling these people would give up and move on to the next victim.  But no, they are persistant.

So last night after they had called three times yesterday, I finally gave in and answered the phone.  I have a hard time hanging up on people and I have a hard time telling people I am not interested in what they are selling, or for them not to call me anymore.  Hence the reason for just not answering.  But alas, I gave in because I wanted the calls to stop.

Lucky for me they weren't selling anything, it was just a survey.  Fine I don't mind the surveys, as long as they aren't dreadfully long.
So mystery caller has been identified.  Let's see how long it takes for the next one to get that persistant.

Daddy's Girl

It's too early for me to be awake.  Well, not in normal person standards but it doesn't help that Julianne decided it was a good idea to stay up until after midnight.  Everytime we tried to put her to bed, she cried.  Everytime Arie tried to go to bed himself as he had to get up early for work, she cried.  But if she was with him, she was fine.  She even followed him around like a lost puppy and then when he wasn't in sight, she cried.  I seriously think this is taking Daddy's Girl to a whole new level.  Certainly she seems to favour him more than me and I am ok with that because I still get my fair amount of attention from her but this is going to a whole new level.  While Arie is flattered (and irritated for still being awake at 12:30 in the morning) I am a little insulted, (but not that much).  More irritated too for still being up at 12:30 and not having been able to have my relaxing few hours before bed.  So much for evening television.  The one thing that I look forward too after she has gone to bed, a couple of hours of just sitting and not having to think.  But apparently she had other plans for us.  Thankfully she is still sleeping but it won't be for much longer.  I heard her making noice already and soon the guy is coming to install this new electric fireplace.  Apparently they don't fit in the fireplaces all that well so he is going to have to be cutting portions of the old fireplace to make it fit.  It's going to be such a joy.  And of course, once again it is snowing and cold.  If it warms up to something semi-reasonable I will take Julianne out to play in the snow, but we can't (or rather, I won't) drive on these streets with her in the car unless I absolutely have to.  But a little snow fun might be in order.  It's currently -12 with a windchill of -20. 
Did I mention how much I hate winter?

How is there enough meat in a short story to make a make movie out of it?  Apparently it can be done.  Examples: The Shawshank Redemption based on the short story, Rita Hayworth and Shawshank Redemption by Stephen King.  Alright, not a great example as it was a novella so somewhat longer than the average short story.
Then there is Brokeback Mountain, based on the short story of the same name by Annie Proulx. 
There are probably a lot more out there but I don't have time to look for them. 
It's just interesting what screenwriters can do with something fairly small.  I haven't actually read the above mentioned short stories but it is going to be a mission of mine to actually check them out. 

Later...

Not quite sure what to write about today.  Nothing new and exciting has developed in our lovely household.  It's warmer today than it has been in a few days.  A balmy -15.  I think it's time to break out the summer clothes.  Funny how we get so climatized.  When it's -20 for awhile, suddenly -1 is incredibly warm but when we have experienced +20 for several days, +5 feels cold.  Our bodies are strange that way.  But either way you cut it, I hate being cold.  I would rather be sweating from the heat than shivering from the cold.  Give me +30 temperatures everyday and I am happy.  Ok maybe that's a little much but between +20-+25 would be ideal.  I think I need to move south.  Really far south.

Our landlord is taking out our wood burning fireplaces and installing electric ones.  Not sure what I think about that.  I like the wood burning but at the same time I have been smelling smoke from other apartments quite frequently and it's nerve wracking when you aren't sure where it's coming from.  Just last night I could smell it and I thought it was coming from my computer because the only time I could smell it was when I was sitting in front of it.  I kept smelling the computer just to make sure but it was fine and it wasn't even warm. Had to be coming from somewhere else.  So maybe this change will be a good thing.  Although if it's used, the electric bill will go up.  Wood is cheaper but more dangerous.  On the other hand, Julianne won't be able to get into the fireplace anymore so that is a blessing, although she has been pretty good about that lately.  Her latest thing has been to unplug the christmas lights and then try to plug them in again.  I am not really ok with that.  But I know eventually she will get over it.  Just not sure when that will be.

And she can climb up on the kitchen chairs now to sit at the table.  The only problem with that is that it's where my laptop is and that's the only reason she wants to climb up there.  Then when we don't let her, she gets angry and throws a little temper tantrum.  I fear she is going to be one of those.  Those children you see in the department stores that throw a fit when they don't get what they want.  Not looking forward to that.  But one baby step at a time.  With all the negative things that are still to come, I know there are going to be a lot of good times to come as well.  Funny how we only think about the bad things though.  I guess cause we can't predict the good, but the bad is inevitable.

Well enough of that.  Gotta go take a shower since the little one is down for a nap.  Oh the peace and quiet.  Enjoy it while it lasts.

Monday Quibbles

It's Monday again.  Yes people, it comes around continuously, whether we want it to or not, every seven days in fact.  For most it's the dreaded beginning of the work week, for some it's not.  Those are the lucky people that work from home so everyday is a work day for them.  Unless of course you have a set schedule and give yourself regular days off.  Or you could work from home and do absolutely nothing even though you're supposed to but instead you leave it all to the very last possible minute and still get it done and no one is the wiser, except you of course.
I  must admit lately, I fall into that last category.  There is a long list of things I should have gotten done at home but the weather has somehow left me uninspired.  I look outside and just the thought of how cold it is outside, for some reason just makes me want to curl up under a blanket with a good book and wait until it blows over.  Even though it is nice and toasty warm inside, Julianne is napping and I have all the time in the world to get a lot done.  In between loads of laundry.  In between cleaning the house, collecting scattered toys and putting them in one spot even though I know that later they will be scattered everywhere again. 
The dishes are washing, there are only a few to do by hand and really that's it.  And of course I sit here in front of my computer blogging about all the things I should be doing, and precious time is slipping away.  Julianne will only sleep for so long, I should be taking advantage of the quiet time but at the same time, when she is asleep I should be taking advantage of the chance to get some much needed housework done. 
There never seems to be enough time.  If only we could add just a few more hours to the day, I could get so much more done.  More housework, more Facebook, more time with my daughter and husband.  I have the feeling I still wouldn't have the time to get the actual paying work done. 
Priorities? 

Not a Toddler, A Monkey

She climbs and I mean she climbs on anything and everything.  Recently Julianne learned how to climb up onto the couch and sit like the average person.  Then she discovered she could climb onto the back of the couch which terrifies me as it's a pretty long fall to the ground below.  So then, not sure if it's to test my patience, or my blood pressure, she decides she is going to climb on the end table.  Nothing on the table as has been the case for as long as we have had a toddler but she found this nice little perch and goes there regularly.  Right in the middle of the table and oh so proud she is.  She sits nice and knows how to get off of it and back onto the couch but I guess the question is, is it ok to let her continue to do this?  Will she grow out of it?  My initial response would be yes but are we setting ourselves up for other problems if we let her do as she pleases now?  Of course we don't let her do EVERYTHING she wants.  Just the stuff that seems innocent enough and no one is getting hurt.  At least not yet.  If we hadn't let her take a few tumbles off the couch I suppose she never would have learned how to get down properly, climb up properly or even sit nice like everyone else.  Chances need to be taken, I know that.  We can't be overprotective about everything.  And there comes a time when it's really more energy than it's worth to prevent her from doing certain things. 

As promised, here is a picture of our Christmas tree. I took a few others but for some reason, everytime I try to take a picture of the tree with all the lights lit up, the image goes blurry.  Like trying to capture the image of a ghost...that just does not want to be caught.    This was the best that came out and it's not all that bad.

I love Christmas!

Oh Christmas Tree!

We finally did it!  The Christmas tree is up and the house is decorated.  It had to be the cutest experience ever with little Julianne and her first tree decorating party.  She watched so carefully as I started to put the decorations on the tree and then she decided she wanted to help.  First she started out just handing me the decorations but soon realized she could do it herself.  She took several of the decorations and laid them ever so nicely IN the tree so that they rested precariously on the branches.  Of course she couldn't actually get the strings over the ends of the limbs in order for them to dangle nicely.  But she was so proud of herself.
Surprisingly after the tree was decorated and lit, she has hardly tried to touch it.  I thought this would be a lot more difficult but the few times that she did try to steal the balls off the tree, we told her no and she left them alone.  Today, at least as long as I have been up, she has not tried to touch the tree at all.

We wanted to take her out to play in the snow today but it's a little too cold.  Currently -8 but very windy.  I am not sure what the windchill is at the moment but it is definately too cold to take her out to play.  If it wasn't so windy we would bundle her up and take her out.  Besides, I think she is starting to get a little cold.  It's not too bad yet but she has been sneezing and last night had a pretty runny nose.  Of course she had been crying so it's hard to tell if the runny nose was because of that or if it was because of an oncoming cold.  I guess only time will tell.  She seems happy enough and is eating properly so there may be nothing to worry about.

As soon as the camera is recharged I will add some pictures of the pretty tree.

I know I said I wouldn't but I couldn't resist.   Besides, I don't have much else to write about.  A winter storm is blowing across our lovely city with a wonderful arctic front on its tale.  Thankfully we aren't going to plummet to those -20 degree temperatures but it's going to get close. 
Big snowflakes are falling but when the wind picks up they all blend together and create an almost white out condition.  It's not cold right now, unless you're foolish enough to stand in the path of the wind but it's coming. 
I think today is a good day to set up the Christmas tree and decorate the house for the festive season.  Need food first through.  Coffee in not going to cut it.  I need full fuel to get through that task.  Should be fun with little miss fingers getting into everything.  Her first Christmas where she will actually be able to move and open her own presents.  Sometimes I think I wish she was still confined to a bouncy chair and content with said bouncy chair.
Until later.

As promised, my loyal readers now get two posts from me in one day!  What is this world coming to?

I have no clues as to what to write about, nothing all that interesting happening on the home front and I refuse to write about our sub-zero temperatures. 

Julianne is eating lunch.  PB&J with bananas again.  And watching Big Comfy Couch on Treehouse.  She loves that show.  Giggles and giggles and giggles.  It's such a treat when she's that happy.  Don't get me wrong she is happy most of the time, but lately she has been having a few more cranky days than I am used to.  But I must brace myself because I know this is nothing compared to what she might be like in a few years. 

My Grandma might be making the trek over the Rocky Mountains to join us for Christmas.  She is alone now since Grandpa died almost 9 years ago and most of the rest of the family left Invermere to get on with their own lives.  Everytime I talk to her she seems so lonely, and she's almost 85 years old so we came up with a plan to get her over for Christmas.  She is excited about the possibility but could still change her mind before the time comes.  It would be nice to have her here.  I haven't spent a Christmas with her since I was about 13 years old.  Yes it's been that long.  Maybe even since I was 12.  That's a long time if you know how old I am now.  And she hasn't seen my brother in even longer.  Since he was about 4 or 5 if I were to hazard a guess.  He is now 26.  So you can imagine how that will be for both of them.

Well, Julianne is just about done with her lunch and the TV show will be over shortly so I must go prepare myself to be her entertainment.  Oh the joys of motherhood.  I get to be a kid again.  What could be better?

Technically it is December 3 already and since I am still awake, thanks to my precious daughter who now thinks it's a good idea to scream and scream until she gets her own way, I will write in my blog.  You know it's really is hard to stay dedicated to this thing.  I have to conciously think about it each and every day.  Unless of course I happen to have a fabulous topic to write about, then I am all over it, first thing, as soon as I can open my laptop.  Sometimes even, my fingers can't keep up with my brain and you will find missing words in sentences.  It's a game I like to play.  Fill in the blanks.  Ha

No not really.  But my brain does often get ahead of my fingers.  If only I could actually type as fast as I think.  That would be truly amazing.  But then sometimes my brain is super slow and then my fingers are too fast for it.  K, that doesn't really make sense, but whatever.  It is 12:14am and most normal people would be asleep by now.  But nope not me. Wide awake.

I did finally get the little one to sleep.  It took forcing her to cuddle with me in the dark until she fell asleep.  I have to admit I almost fell asleep too but then my neck started to get sore in the chair so figured it was time to get her to bed and then I had the full intention to I too going off to bed, but instead, after moving around I was suddenly awake and ready to go.  So of course, start checking email and all that wonderful stuff that beckons me to the computer, like an addict.  God it's pathetic.  I have to learn to say no to the computer.  I tried that this weekend actually and it went not too bad.  I had just had enough of it and needed a break.

But that was only one day and then suddenly it was the beginning of the week again and I was right back at it.  Mind you, I have been accomplishing quite a bit the last little while.  Getting more writing done than I have in a long time and keeping up with the blogging. 

Seriously I think I could go on all night.  I could sit here and just write and write everything that comes into my mind.  It would probably be rather entertaining but it would go on and on and on and on and I know my faithful readers out there actually have things to do with  their day.  Like work or something. 

So this is where I will cut it off and say good night.  Or good morning depending on where in the world you are, you might just be waking up from a wonderful deep sleep.  (You know who you are.)

Until later...literally...probably later this morning.  You lucky people might actually get two posts out of me today. 

I Did It!

Julianne's first intelligable words other than Mama or Dada.  I couldn't believe it.  Last night she woke in the middle of the night screaming.  Bad dream perhaps but I still find it hard to believe that a child under 2 can have nightmares.  What could they possibly have nightmares about?  But whatever.  The fact still remains that she woke up and she was not happy.  A blood curdling scream in fact.  But once she was up, she was fine.  Happy and wanted to play. 
She has just recently learned how to climb on the couch unassisted and last night was no exception.  She pulled herself up onto the couch, turned and sat properly, and proudly exclaimed, "I did it."  Arie and I were so surprised and pleased.  Of course my initial reaction was that it was a fluke.  But I repeated the 3 word phrase to her and she said it again.  It was absolutely one of the cutest things I have seen in a long time, another step in her already fast moving life.  She is growing up so fast, I can't keep up. 
I often sit and wonder what life will be like when she's 15.  In that dreadful teenage, coming of age, stage.  And I just hope that I can be there for her, or that she will let me be there for her, like I was last night.

Later.

PB & J

There are few things that take me back to my childhood but PB & J us surely on the top of the list.  For those of you not familiar with the old acronym, Peanut Butter & Jam.  The reality series Big Brother really brought it back to the foreground of people's thoughts but who could ever really forget this favourite treat.  Comfort food from the past, but only if you had a good childhood and the reminiscing brings back happy thoughts.

Yesterday I took Julianne on a playdate with a friend.  When we sat down for lunch I gave Julianne a tuna salad sandwich but her playdate friend got PB&J.  Julianne instantly proceeded to steal the food off of his plate and claimed it as her own.  Lesson learned:  Always give children the same food so they don't steal the other's food.  Thankfully he didn't seem to mind much, even though he is 3 years old and at that age that sharing might not be the happiest moment in his life.

So this afternoon, I have given Julianne a PB&J sandwich and she is still eating it in complete silence.  Very focused and cooperative.  Gotta love it when a plan comes together. (oooh another blast from the past, A-Team for those of you unfamiliar with 80's television.

Her lunch may be a little messy but if she's happy that's all that really matters.  Content and quiet.  These are the days you really treasure your children, when they're happy and not wearing on your every nerve.

Later...

Holy Snow!  I don't recall it having been forcasted for today but alas, we got more snow.  It's said that it will be gone again in a few days only to get a HUGE dump on Friday.  Should be loads of fun.
Today the snow wasn't what was so bad, it was the wind that came with it.  Blizzard like conditions this afternoon, it was such a joy.  Thank god I was all snug and warm at home.

These weather posts are kind of dull so I promise to be more interesting the rest of the week.  Unless of course we get that huge dump that's forcasted, then you might actually see pictures.  :)

Until tomorrow...

I seem to be on a roll keeping up with this blog posting.  At least for this week.  Some days I have no problem finding something to write about but then there are the days, like today, that you may see just a lot of rambling about nothing in particular.  It's Sunday. Supposed to be the day of rest but here I am up at 6am as is the norm for Sunday mornings and tired beyong belief.  Everything in me tells me to go back to bed, Julianne did, but there is so much that needs to get done and if I go back to sleep I know I will sleep longer than planned and then the day will feel wasted.  So instead, I sit here in front of the computer, talking about nothing in particular, just waiting to do the laundry.  Being in an apartment, they frown on doing laundry before 8am any day of the week.  Something about showing respect for the other tenants in the building.  And if I don't get in there right at 8am there is a chance that someone will get there ahead of me and then I have to wait even longer to get that part done and that will annoy me all to hell.  When I am ready to do something, I hate for anything to get in the way of it.  Don't mess with my personal schedule.  Ha. 

***Pause***

Not that you would actually know it but I was gone for approximately 5 minutes, putting the laundry in and getting the next load ready.  Not bad timing if I do say so myself.  Only 25 minutes to wait and then another trip upstairs. 

Not too sure what the rest of my day consists of.  I have some ideas, a list of things that ought to get done, but whether they actually will or not is a completely different story.

Well, I think this was a pretty boring post but at least it's something.  Maybe something of interest later today or tomorrow.

Happy Grey Cup Sunday!!!  (I hate football.)  But if I had to choose, Go Roughriders!

And So It Begins...

The Christmas season is officially upon the van Eck household.  Our patio is decked out with all the Christmas lights, there is so much red it could be called an Amsterdam whore house.  But in all honesty it looks pretty good.  Arie is obsessed with Christmas lights.  Says he only gets excited one time a year.  Sad really if that's the ONLY thing he gets excited about but it is something. 

The Christmas tree and indoor decorations will come next weekend or throughout the week, little by little, bit by bit.  The indoor stuff is my territory even if it sounds like Arie is more into than I am.  I really do like this season, but the thought of all the lights makes our patio and apartment the centre of attention.  Something I am not as keen about.  But it is Christmas and you gotta get into the spirit and so it begins.  Will probably add a few photos at a later date.  Maybe when it's ALL done.

It's evening and there is nothing particular to post about today.  Although we finally got the snow that has been forcasted for almost every day this week.  And holy what a mess.  At least for the first little bit of my travel home.  It could have been worse though.  Far worse.  But I made it home safely and without incident.  By Sunday this little snowstorm should be a thing of the past, just a distant memory.  As Grey Cup Sunday approaches, temperatures will rise and alas, all the snow will be gone.  I can't wait. 
I have to admit I have been a little spoiled the last 15 months.  Not daring to go out in miserable weather unless I really had to and the fact is, I never had to, so this was a bit of a shock.  But I remained patient, singing in the car as I slid all over the road in some spots, although I was doing no more than 10km/h in most spots.  But slippery is slippery.  I have to say, I think I am a pretty good winter driver, it's the summer driving that's debatable.  But now that's something I won't have to worry about much until next year.  For now, focus on the winter driving and make sure I make home safe and sound every time.

Ridiculous...

I dreamt last night that someone broke into our apartment while we were sleeping and stole my bathroom cupboards.  I don't just mean the cupboard doors, I mean EVERYTHING.  The sink, the countertops, everything that was underneath including toilet paper and even the separate medicine cabinet and mirror.  What the hell?  Why would anyone want to steal that?  And seriously, how did they manage to do it without anyone waking up?  I am a deep sleeper but not that deep.  It's not like it would just come off the wall with a snap and a pull and a tug.  And to get it out the bathroom door would be another problem.  There is a baby gate in front of it so that surely would have made noise and it wouldn't have fit properly.  I suppose we could have been sedated but there was no evidence of that in the dream.  I went on to phone the landlady to let them know this had been stolen and how I suspected a particular other tenant of having done it.  Really?  What would another tenant want with my bathroom cupboards?  They have the almost exact same one in their own apartment.
As ridiculous as this all sounds, cause it was a dream, I did find some consolation in the fact that they left the toilet.  No toilet paper, but at least I had a toilet.

I know I should write something but I can't think of anything interesting to write about.  There are all the annoying things in the world but who really wants to hear abut the 'o' key sticking on my laptop every now and again.  It's not all the time but sporadically.  I hate sporadic.  Seriously, if you're not going to work, then don't work all the time, don't decide to work only when you feel like it and then when I start talking about it, you work just fine.  Making a liar out of me. 

Or how about the lady that was telling bold faced lies about me the other day?  That's annoying as hell.  I want to call her up and give her a piece of my mind but is it really worth it?  I know the truth and that should be all that matters.

Or what about the people that you just don't  like?  They never did anything to you but for some reason just their presence rubs you the wrong way and the way they talk or seem to look down on you.  Perceptions of certain situations can be very misleading.  As a matter of fact, above mentioned persn (oh there's the o key again) has made an interesting impression on me just recently.  I have had a little insight into above mentioned persons background and suddenly I feel better.  It's amazing what a difference getting to know someone can make even if it's not face to face.

How about the lack of appreciation many people get?  In the work place and in everyday life.  There are those people that go above and beyond the call of duty on a daily basis and yet they are not acknowledged and worse yet, they begin t (ha, 3rd time the o isn't working) be taken advantage of for it.  Not fair at all.
But a fact of life.

But there are good things to fcus (number 4) on as well.  How abut (5) getting into the program you wanted at the price yu (6, see I wasn't lieing) negotiated.  It's great when a plan comes together.  Maybe the future is a little brighter.  Just gotta get past all the garbage and live to the best of your ability.  Shit, I fear I am getting a little too philosophical here.  Whatever.  Have fun in what life has to offer, revel in the good things, learn from the bad and just keep on going.

How's that for a blg for you.  (And again no 'o').  I think I should clean the keyboard.

I was inspired by a dear friend to freshen up my blog page.  As you might notice it's now pink.  Much more suitable for me.  I like pink and honestly if I had seen that template before I probably would have snatched it right up to begin with.  But change is good from time to time.  The format is still pretty much the same although some features are now on the other side of the page and of course the colour scheme is different. 

Julianne has learned to spin in circles and walk backwards.  No not at the same time.  I don't think I could even do that and I have no desire to find out.  She makes me dizzy just watching her.  She spins, falls and laughs so hard, it's so cute.  And the walking backwards, well that's just like it sounds.  She is learning how to walk backwards and doing pretty good at it.  It hadn't even occured to me when she started walking that she would also need to learn to do that.  I figured, ok, she can walk now, not much else to wait for in anticipation.  But alas, she has proved me wrong and shown me that there are still many, many things she has to learn. 

She has the attitude down pretty good.  When she doesn't get what she wants or something is taken  away from her that she shouldn't have, she sceams, borderline temper tantrum without the kicking and punching the floor, although she has taken to hitting her head against the wall when she is angry, or the table.  Then she hurts herself cause she head butts it too hard and then she starts crying harder cause now her head hurts.  Yes she has A LOT to learn.  She does like to share though.  Her food, her drinks, fuzzies on the floor, whatever she finds, she tries to give it away.  It's cute and when you tell her you don't want it, it's hers, she takes it, no worries and goes about her business.  She definitely understands more than we give her credit for.  Ask if she wants a bath she runs squealing to the bathroom, ask her if she wants to go for a car ride she runs to the couch waiting for shoes and socks, then after shoes and socks are in place, she runs for the front door and waits for us to leave.  Ask her if it's time for bed or needs a diaper change, often she will run to her bedroom, although she actually hides in the closet once in there, it's close enough.  Ask her if she's hungry or thirsty, straight to the kitchen she goes.  She even tries to open the fridge but hasn't quite mastered that yet. Ask her for a certain toy and she will go get it.
She is definitely a smart cookie.

Windy in Calgary

Holy toledo!  It's so windy in Calgary today.  Every time a chinook makes it way over the mountains and graces us with some beautiful warm weather, it also brings with it the wind.  Some days are worse than others, like yesterday was nice and warm and there was very little wind, a little but it was livable.  Today however, the wind is gusting, and shrieking through the trees outside and through every tiny crevice it can find.  I was surprised that this didn't bother Julianne because it sure as hell bothers me.  It sounds like ghosts wailing and crying, trying to scare the living bejeezus out of you.
There is this tree right outside our apartment window.  It's a huge tree and looks to be relatively sturdy, but I have my doubts.  Despite it's massive size, it weaves and sways much worse than some of the smaller trees, giving the feeling that at any moment it's going to tumble over, either crashing backwards into the upstairs apartments or taking the tumble forward into my car beneath it.  Not that that would be such a horrible thing.  If it crashed into my car, most certainly it would be a right off, relieving me of the repairs that will inevitably be required before I return the car next year.
But alas, that is just a dream.  Or a nightmare, depending on how one looks at it.  On the negative side, I would be stuck with the inconvenience of no longer having a car, having to make the trek to the car dealership to find another one.  It would cause more hassle than it's really worth, I think. 
But of course I can't control what the wind might do.

Later.

I was walking through Superstore today with Arie and Julianne and out of nowhere I suddenly see Mark coming towards me, in the same aisle.  I won't bother explaining who Mark is, because I am sure that most of the people reading this already know him.  I felt every part of my body tense up and it was like the air was sucked out of my own personal bubble.  I stared forward and tried to not even look at him.  I didn't even turn to see where my husband and daughter were, I just kept moving forward.  I didn't want to turn around for fear that he had recognized me and had turned to confirm.  If I had turned around and he had seen me, it would have confirmed to each other that we had been noticed and I know I sure didn't want that. 
All I wanted to do was get out of that store.  We were already heading for the checkout anyways but now I was really in a hurry.  My face felt flushed and I felt a wave of nausea.  I needed air and quickly.  I hadn't realized it but I must have been holding my breath, for the second we stepped outside the air was released and I felt better as the cool November air washed over me.
When we got in the car, all I wanted to do was tell my husband how much I appreciate him and my daughter and to thank him for the wonderful life I now have. 
I never would have thought that seeing someone that has not been a part of my life in several years would have had such a negative impact.  Even though those were probably some of the worst years of my life, but it's over and I have a wonderful husband and daughter.
Never forget what you have and hold on to it.  Appreciate it.  Love it.

Christmas Is Coming

So Hallowe'en is over and now the next thing we Canadians have to think about is Christmas.  Even though it's less than two months away, I am already making plans and actually looking forward to it this year.  Believe it or not, I have even started shopping already.  I only have one thing but that's one more thing than I normally have this time of year.  Usually we wait until December to do the shopping but I am so tired of spending all that money at one time and then being stressed about the other bills, so not this year.  My goal is to have at least 3/4 of the shopping done by the end of November.

When is the right time to put up lights and the Christmas tree?  Last year we did it the middle of November but I thought that was too early, but Arie wanted to do it so bad.  I have this sneaking suspicion that he really likes Christmas.  This year will be even more fun now that Julianne is a little older and can actually open her own gifts.  I hope. 

So Arie wants to do it early again and now he even wants to wait until 10 or 11 in the morning to open presents.  That's just not natural.  Presents are meant to be opened first thing in the morning.  Well at least the stockings are but it still doesn't seem normal to wait that long.  I guess we will just play it by ear and see what happens. 

As well as the gifts, I am already planning my Christmas dinner.  That is the fun part.  Looking for interesting recipes for different things just to get an idea of what to do.  Looking forward to it.  Maybe I will even share some of my findings. 

Until later...

H1N1: Tensions Rise

Pandemic: a sudden outbreak that becomes very widespread and affects a whole region, a continent or the world.

It's fun to mock a rising pandemic especially when we don't really understand what's going on.  The media has created such a panic, but can you really blame them?  The World Health Organization announced a global pandemic and just the word makes it sound like we are going through a plague.  People are dying everywhere, oh my god, this is serious.  The fact is that more people die every year from the regular (and constantly mutating) influenza.  The difference?  We don't hear about it like we have heard about every single person that has died from H1N1.

Last week in Calgary I watched the steady throng of people race to the 1 of the 4 vaccination clinics set up in a city of over 1,000,000.  Tensions rose as these people waited in line ups upwards of 6 hours to get a shot that hasn't even been properly tested in Canada.  We raced to vaccinate our children, the elderly, the pregnant and any one with chronic illnesses but ended up running out of the vaccine because so many people that could have waited a few weeks were terrified and wanted to get it now.  And of course no one was turned away.  And these people were angry.  Come on, it was YOUR choice to stand in the line up.  No one said you HAD to get the vaccine.  But the media made it sound like if you contracted this virus, you were going to die.

The fact of the matter, like any other illness from influenza to the common cold, if you take care of yourself, practice good hygiene, eat properly, get enough sleep, your chances of becoming ill decrease.

I am not against vaccinations, but there is a time and a place and they should not be administered when not adequately tested. 

It's Hallowe'en

This used to be one of my favourite times of the year but now it's just another day.  It's more for the kids anyway.  I am not dressing Julianne up this year, mainly because it's not like we can take her out trick or treating.  She won't eat the candy, so hubby and I would end up eating it and lord knows neither of us needs that.  Besides she can't say anything except mama, dada, dis, dat, or hi.  Not enough time to teach her to say trick or treat so we will wait for next year. 
I don't think Arie is much for hallowe'en either.  When I did stop for brief moments to look at potential costumes for her, he would just scrunch up his face.  He didn't have to say anything, it was obvious what he was thinking.  So alas, I will wait until next year to start this annual tradition.  I just hope she never wants me to make her a costume because that is where I am lacking.  Give me something to write about no problem, tell to make a costume or come up with an idea, ha, it will never happen.
Today it's so scary letting your kids out this time of year.  You have to be even more careful than when I was a child as there are that many more pedophiles and just bad people.  Or is it that the media makes you more scared?  That's very likely too.

Well, I think this is my post for the day.  Wait for more tomorrow.

A Conflict At Work

Ok people...I am doing this free fall writing exercise as given by a friend and I got started but somewhere along the way, the story took a turn.  I would love some suggestions for the ending.  Here is what I have so far:

Barb ran into the office. She was fifteen minutes late again. She had already been reprimanded twice, and once more she would be written up. She didn’t see the big deal. It’s not like she planned on being late each morning. She just had a hard time with the traffic. She contemplated moving closer to work just to avoid the Deerfoot traffic every morning but she liked where she lived and she shouldn’t have to move just to appease her employer.


When she stepped through the door she was surprised at how quiet the office was. Where was everyone? As she rounded the corner, she saw several of her co-workers huddled in the corner, around Jaycee’s desk. Perfect, no one would have clue she had been late.

Barb slipped into her cubicle, dropped her jacket and purse then walked over the huddle. As she approached, the hushed whispers became clearer. “What was he thinking?” “I can’t believe it.” “I’m just speechless.” “What’s going to happen to the rest of us?”

“What’s going on?” Barb asked.

“Did you see your email this morning?” Jaycee asked.

“No why?”

“There’s an interoffice email going around. Check it out.” Jaycee turned her computer around so Barb could get a look at the screen.

“Oh my god,” she said. “Has Charles seen this?”

“I don’t think so. He’s not here yet.”

“Should we just get rid of it?”

“I think it’s too late for that. He’s probably already got it.”

“Who sent it?”

“Well that’s the funny thing. Somehow, whoever did this, was able to create a new user so there’s no name attached. It could have come from any one’s computer. This building is huge.”

“Surely they can trace the IP address.”

“Probably, but that might take all day. We’re probably going to be called into the office one at a time until someone confesses.”

“That’ll make for a fun day.”

“Unless someone just comes forward and gets it over with.”

“I doubt that’s going to happen.”

“Sssshhh, here he comes.”

And that is where I am lost.  What is it that is on the computer?  Does it have to do with Charlie or is it something else completely different?  Suggestions please.
And no, there is no prize for the best ending, just my gratitude.  :)

Take A Deep Breath

Just when I thought I was going to lose it, I told myself, take a deep breath, be patient, it's no big deal.  Cereal all over the floor.  Yes, Julianne has this wonderful habit of not wanting to eat her food out of a bowl or off of a plate.  Instead she tips everything over so she eat it off the table or her high chair tray.  This morning it was the table.  We are trying to teach her to eat at the table like the rest of us but unfortunately the table doesn't go as far in as the high chair tray.  So this morning as soon as she got a hold of the bowl of cereal I gave her (no milk) it was all over the floor in seconds.  For a split second I wanted to scream but I gained my composure and realized, kids will be kids and this is the way she likes it.  Even though it means I will be down on the floor cleaning up every last tiny little morsel.  It was no small mess that's for sure but I was proud of myself for staying calm and just going with the flow.  Sorry for the cliche.

For some of you, that I know are reading this, this might be a deterant for having your own children, but it all comes with the territory.  Take from it what you will.  It's just a tiny setback or annoyance within all the great reasons for having a child.  There are good days and there are bad days.  It comes down to choosing which ones are going to be the good ones and what things you are going to let bother you.  Granted there are days that you just can't avoid it.  The days you want to pull your hair out and ask, what the hell was I thinking.  But in the end it is still worth it.  So far anyway.

Cheers.

What happened?

What happened to the 5-10cm of snow that was forcasted for Calgary.  It was supposed to snow all night and we would all awake from our slumber to find a beautiful winter wonderland.  Ok, I am making it sound nice only because we don't have it.  If we did have it, this would be a completely different blog this morning.  But we'll go with the happy thoughts today.

It is a good morning.  No snow, Julianne is happy, and I didn't wake up cranky.  Of course there is still a lot of day left.  Anything could happen.

I was thinking last night about sustainability.  I got an email for a call for submissions to a magazine whose next theme is sustainability.  But does it have to relate only to the enviroment and protecting our renewable resources?  How about sustainability in your life, making sure you do all the right things now so that the rest of your family doesn't suffer later?  It could make an interesting piece I think.  Dealing with emotional, mental and physical well being.  Or how the decisions you make today could affect not only the rest of your life but the lives of others around you., or even how decisions you have made in the past have already affected those you love.  Well I have to think about it a little more and see what transpires, if anything.

For now, I still have a book review to complete and to work on some other pieces that are floating around. But there is always time for something new.

Cheers

Moody Monday

I think my kitchen is smaller than before.  No it hasn't actually shrunk, but we moved to a bottom floor apartment a month ago and even though the apartment is virtually exactly the same, I swear the kitchen is smaller.  I feel more cluttered than normal everytime I walk in there.  It can never be clean enough or organized enough to make me feel better. 
The bathroom is bigger, but it doesn't help.  The living room and dining room have almost a foot more spaced to them but yet, it feels smaller.  We have started to leave all of Julianne's toys in her bedroom now, and she can play in there, but all the toys still end up out in the living room and it seems even messier than when the toys were left in the living room. 
Every morning I wake  up to find a mess that has not been cleaned up from the night before and on this particular Monday, it's too much.  For some reason, I already woke up cranky, so Julianne's normal run around the house all excited, touching things that she shouldn't, has irritated me more than usual.  The thought of the ever growing pile of laundry makes my head want to explode.  I know it has to get done, but it's another one of those tasks that is practically impossible to accomplish when you have a child that doesn't want to take naps during the day anymore, or when she does, it means she won't decide to go to sleep until really late.  Later than is acceptable for a child of her age.  But what is acceptable, I suppose is the question?
I can't enjoy my coffee in the morning until she has food first.  Everything is about her. Am I resentful? Maybe just a little but it will pass, as will the moodiness I am feeling on this particular Monday.

Too Frickin' Early

It's Sunday morning again.  The wonderful morning I have to get up early and drive my dear husband to work.  I hate Sundays.  I tend to have late nights due to not being able to sleep so when you fall asleep around 3 in the morning, 6am comes way to bloody soon.  I found myself wishing that last night was the time change instead of next weekend, just so I could still that one extra hour.  Although I am unsure on whether that would have made that much of a difference.  But an hour is an hour.  60 whole extra minutes of rest.

Today is somewhat different though as I actually have to be somewhere else in an hour so I would have had to get up early regardless, but not as early.  On the upside, I will be tired tonight.  I hope.  I pray. 

This blogging thing is kind of catching on for me too.  I am pretty surprised that I have remained committed to writing for as long as I have.  In other ways too.  I have actually been writing other stories again...something I have procrastinated on for some time now.  Even submitted a couple of stories.  So unlike me.  So either the blog is helping or I have just found encouragment and motivation again.  Either way, it feels pretty good.  Even though I am so frickin' tired.

Cheers.

Last night I had this fabulous idea for a blog entry but this morning do you think I can remember what it was?  I should have just done it yesterday when I was thinking about it.  I missed an entry yesterday, the day was just too incredibly busy to get it done.  But that is the way it goes sometimes.

So instead I am left at a loss for an idea to write about.  It's another snowy white Calgary day in October...although we are getting to the point where this is actually normal.  The snow is fallling, thick and wet but it is still warm out so instead of a white blanket on the ground we are left with 2 inches of slush.  Hope your boots are waterproof.

I don't know how long this will last, neither do the weatherpeople.  I understand that it's hard to predict/forcast Calgary weather accurately but our weather people rarely get it right.

Well now I  have something to write about.  HA...My daughter is covered in zinc cream.  I am usually so good at making sure I clean up all her diaper paraphanelia but alas, a few minutes ago I forgot.  So now, she is covered in white cream.  Ok, not right at this exact moment because I was the dutiful mother and cleaned her up before I came to write about it.  Cream on his face, hands, clothes, the floor.  On a good note, when I ran in the room to grab it before she got into anymore, she had put the lid on the container.  What a smart little girl. 

And now she is in the closet.  Do not call Child Protective Services.  No, I do not put her in the closet.  She goes of her own volition.  The jacket and shoe closet mostly.  And pulls out every last shoe in there.  It's a daily game we play.  She pulls them all out, and we put them all back and so it goes, on and on and on.  She has actually found shoes that I wasn't aware I still had.  So is it really a bad thing?  She enjoys it, and it keeps her quiet for awhile.

Something to Write About

Topics to write about do not come easy.  I mull and mull over what amazing words of wisdom I can share with the world, (or just the few that are actually reading this blog).  Words that might inspire, make you laugh or cry, make you roll your eyes due to the shear idiocy of the topic or my ridiculous opinion on a certain subject.  But it's my opinion so deal with it.
Sometimes I might share a bit of something that went on during the day before or some strange occurance in the world around me, something out of the ordinary or maybe not so out of the ordinary but might have struck me with amusement, shock, or horror...or maybe something that is not so surprising at all and was bound to happen eventually.

Take government offices for example.  Everyone has some kind of beef with a government run service and it was only a matter of time before someone was stressed or pissed off enough to take a stand and have their voice heard.  8 people were held hostage in the Edmonton WCB offices yesterday.  For those that might read that and not know what WCB is, Workers Compensation Board.  A governement run service for employees that get hurt on the job.  It's a good service to have, but like any government service, there are bound to be hiccups somewhere in the system.  The only that really surprises me is how the man with gun even got into the building without being noticed.  I have been to the WCB office in Calgary and you can't even get into the parking lot without first speaking to someone.  The front doors are locked so you have to ring a buzzer before you can be let into the building.  From my understanding, the man had a rifle, so how on earth did he conceal that and gain entrance. 
The system isn't perfect, far from it...but when you're hurt on the job and your employer verifies this information, why is it so hard for some people to get what is rightfully deserved by Canadian law?  I don't know the whole situation and why this man went in there but it always seems that the little people get screwed while the big businesses and government just keep on bending us over and well...you get the picture.
We're in the midst of a recession yet the government will spend millions to help out the big businesses that are struggling because they didn't know how to manage their company and be prepared for times like this, they continued to pay their top executives big money so they neared bankruptcy and yet, those people that are now out of a job due to cutbacks, get a measly, 55% of their wage if they apply for Employment Insurance Benefits.  Even a woman on maternity leave only gets 55% of her wage on Employment Insurance. But wait, now the government has extended the allowable weeks for someone collecting EI because of layoffs.  Woo wee, they sure went above and beyond there.

Well, I guess that will be my government rant for the day, well probably for the year...out of shear need to have something to write about today...

Through the Eyes of Child

Remember the days when life was simple, you had no worries in the world except which Barbie to play with today. (of course now Barbie is frowned upon, proving to give children a lack of self esteem)
Sometimes I miss those days.  Naps in the day without anyone bothering you, in fact they wanted you to sleep.  Someone preparing all your meals for you, bathing you, brushing your teeth, and just generally making sure all your needs are taken care of.  Mornings spent watching cartoons, although back in the day I only remember Saturday morning cartoons and now there are cartoons on every morning.  Either I was getting ripped off or times have changed.  Actually, you can get 24 hours of children's programming now.  What does that say about us?  Ok, that's getting a little off topic.

I was watching Julianne and couldn't help but smile at her fascination in our cat, Smudge.  (there is a story behind the name but we'll that for another day).  She waves at the cat as if she will wave back, she chases the cat around and tries to get close enough to touch her but it never happens.  Smudge will have none of that.  She's skittish as is so with a child around, now you see her, now you don't.  But Julianne never gives up.  Smudge will run off to the bedroom and stay hidden for hours and then she will peek her head out again as if to check if the coast is clear.  Then she comes out and Julianne sees her and it's like the cat had never left.  It's amusing to watch.  Julianne doesn't get that the cat doesn't want to be touched and of course why would she, she doesn't even understand that she isn't supposed to change the channel on the TV or turn the computer off while Daddy is using it.  But her persistance is beautiful.  If only we can maintain that much persistance and perserverence in our lives.

Something happens when we reach adult hood.  More than likely the sudden realization that no one is going to do anything for us anymore and the responsibility that comes with being on your own.  We lose that spark that was once strong within us all.  We see all the bad things in the world for what it is and we lose that imagination, that determination, that innocence.

Is there a way to get it back?

Where Does the Time Go?

I was thinking last night about how strange it is that time slies by as we get older.  I remember when I was younger, we're talking pre-teens here, how it seemed that finishing high school was soooooooo far away and I couldn't wait for it to happen but my god, it was years and years away.  Then as soon as you finally get there, the time just starts to whiz by. 

Even more noticeable is the growth of my little girl.  It seems like only yesterday that she was the tiny 6lb 1oz bundle but yet that can't be possible as she almost 14 months old, and 25lbs.  She has personality and attitude, oh does she have attitude.  But she is such a treasure.  Although there are days I could just run away and forget about all of this, all the obligations, I really don't want to miss a thing.  Even the screams and temper tantrums all have their place in the growth of this little human.

I have to remember that.

Julianne back down for nap, don't know how long that will last though.  She is rubbing her eyes so figured now is a better time for her to nap rather than the middle of day because then she doesn't go to sleep at night.
This should be the perfect opportunity to get some things done.  But will it happen?

I am already doing a little laundry so I am part way there.  But the cleaning of other areas of the house, good grief, I did them yesterday, but when I look at it now, it looks like nothing was done.  I get so tired of having to clean and re-clean the same areas of the house day after day.  If only there was a magic button I could push and it would all be done.

Cheers...

What to do, what to do...

Up bright and early on this wonderful Sunday morning to do the usual drive the hubby to work because Calgary Transit sucks on Sunday.  I hate Sundays for this reason as I have to get up at 6am whether I want to or not.  Don't get me wrong, I am a morning person, just not THAT early in the morning.  So lucky for me, Julianne actually fell asleep in the car on the way home, so I thought "Great, I can put her down for a nap and then catch a few more zzzz's.  This actually did work perfectly.  Well for about an hour.  7:30am she is awake and wants food. 
So fed, changed, watered, yada yada, I am awake and trying to figure out what to do with my day.  I have a list of things that need to get done, things that should get done and things I want to get done.  It's a pretty long list.  Then of course I sit and contemplate what to blog about this morning.  But there is one thing on my mind right now...smoking.
Yes I have vowed to quit smoking.  So I blogged about that on my other blog, which you can see too.  A 365 day docmentation of quitting smoking and today is day 1. See link to the left if you wish to follow that one too, I welcome the support.
So the list today includes:
-Housework: dishes, vacuuming, laundry, clean up baby toys.
-Empty boxes in closet that still haven't been emptied since we moved. 
-Find a home for junk in bedroom. These probably go along with housework but I don't want to add anymore to that particular list.
-Put more pictures on the walls, it's looking a little dull.
-Take Julianne for a walk.
-Deadlines: October 31, short story
-December 31, book review
-December 31, short story
-Do some writing, besides the blogging.
-Vow to stay away from Facebook today.  I admit I am a bit of a junkie and when I am on there, NOTHING gets done.  Probably another part of the reason I don't go to sleep well.

And of course through all of this, chase active baby, keeping her out of things she is not supposed to be in.

Well I guess I better stop blogging and get at it.  The stuff isn't going to get done on its own.

Cheers...

Can't Sleep...Again

So it's 11pm and once again I can't sleep.  I don't know what the problem is.  I have been on my computer most of the evening doing absolutely nothing productive, just playing as usual, when I really should be getting some other work done.  Two deadlines fast approaching and yet, even though I can't sleep, I am not working on it.

It's been months now since I have been able to sleep properly.  I get up early, except for this morning, and still end up staying up late.  When I do feel that I am tired, I can't bring myself to lie down and if I do, I lay awake in bed for hours.  My mind filled with thoughts of all the things I should be getting done or should have done during the day, berating myself for not doing what should have been done and then saying, oh well, I'll do it tomorrow.  And of course, tomorrow comes and still it doesn't get done.  This goes for writing deadlines, housework, shopping, bill paying.  Everything gets put off for another day.  Eventually they do get done, but it's usually all at once or at the last minute and then I am stressed because I know I could have done it all a long time before and I didn't. 

For one thing, I have a hard time sleeping in the same bed as my husband but I think that is only half of the problem.  He is such a bed hog and he snores.  Why can't people just sleep peacefully, quietly and on their own side of the bed.  I make every effort to stay in my own space but he seems to think that my space is also his space.  There are limits people.  I remember growing up, living with my grandparents, they never slept in the same bed unless there was company and they needed to.  Grandma once told me it was because Grandpa slept with his arms behind  his head and she would wake up with a black eye.  I never saw evidence of this when they did share a bed but maybe they were on to something.  Of course, our bedroom is not big enough to fit to smaller beds, the layout is all wrong so I don't think that's an option.  There must be some happy medium.  I get tired of falling asleep on the couch and when hubby falls asleep on the couch, part of me is glad but another part of me misses him being beside me.  I don't know if there is a solution.  Do I just suck it up and do what I have been doing for the past couple of years?  It didn't seem this bad when we first got married but after having Julianne it seems that I feel crowded all the time.  I have always had trouble sleeping but it has definitely gotten worse over the last year. 

Stress?  I don't feel stressed, at least no more than usual but maybe that is it.  I suppose stress occurs more often when you have children, especially young ones. 

Is there a way to slow down the brain so that sleep will come?  Mom has suggested herbal tea which I have tried and it doesn't work.  I can't stand warm milk so that's not even an option.  I won't take sleeping pills, medication is not the answer.  I need to relax. 

Or maybe just stop procrastinating and get the things done that need to be done. 

Now it's 11:20pm.  Wow, 20 minutes of steady writing.  This is rare.

Maybe this blog thing was a good idea after all.

Cheers...

Huh? Twitter?

Maybe someone else can explain to me the fascination with Twitter.  I really don't get it.  So you leave little updates about what you're doing at any exact moment and your friends and followers really care?  Or you follow some celebrity but isn't that almost like stalking?
And this is fun for people???

I had been asked to join Twitter awhile back so out of curiosity I decided to check it out.  I didn't get it then and I still don't get it now.  I went back on there today just to see if now that I was more alert or something I could perhaps figure out the fascination.  I noticed this time around you could add the celebrities or "important people" of the world.  I decided to follow a couple and see what happened.  And the answer is nothing.  Al Gore thanked Barack Obama for something, Lance Armstrong just finished a bike ride (really long one I might add and not the Tour de France) and someone else just didn't make any sense.  I guess I haven't been following long enough.  And the friend that had invited me to join in the first place hadn't done anything in ages so I think she found it as useless as I do. 

But alas, I believe I could be missing something.  The actual functionality or benefit of this service?  So please, if anyone has an idea, do tell.

Cheers...

Saturday Morning, No Sleeping In

Gone are the days of sleeping in late on Saturday mornings. Every since my daughter was born just over a year ago, this once guilty pleasure is a thing of the past. Or so I thought.

6:30am, Julianne screaming for something. Probably food. In the back of my mind I am hoping and praying that she will just find her way back to sleep and let me sleep a little while longer but to no avail. The screaming continues. Does this make me a bad mother to just want to rest at this ungodly hour?
Finally, the guilt overtakes me and I get up just to throw some milk in a bottle and hand it to the demanding toddler. Then I, toddle myself back to bed. Don't worry, I laid awake listening to her gulp down every last drop, careful to listen for signs of choking or anything of that nature.
Once I was sure she was done, and she was nice and quiet, I slowly drifted back to sleep.
10am, she is awake again. This time, although I was still wishing she would sleep, I knew that I couldn't ignore her and got up to begin my day.
This method, although perhaps some would disagree, works very well for me. I need that little extra sleep and she is fully capable, finally, of feeding herself.
Now we sit, I at my laptop, typing away about my morning and her in her high chair, eating up all her toast and grapes. The milk cup and her bowl have now ended up on the floor so I suppose it's time to wrap this up and get her cleaned up.
Oh did I mention that after getting her dressed this morning she got a hold of her toothbrush and decided it was fun to wash it in the toilet? The joys of motherhood continue daily.

Cheers

Keeping on keeping on...

Day 2 and I am still going strong. I don't know how long I can keep this up but I am sure going to give it my best effort.

So last night I was sitting back enjoying a little Thursday evening television when my husband decided he was going to prepare for our daughters swim lessons. By prepare I just mean getting the bag together with all the things that she would need, ie. bathing suit, towels etc. For everything that he was looking for he would ask...Where is this? Where is that? Seriously, why is it that men don't like to look for things on their own? They always need someone to tell them where it is when really it's in the most obvious spot, her dresser. Where else could it be? I could understand asking where something is after you have already looked in the most obvious places but to not even look first...Or why do men not lift up things to look under them for particular items?
Just one of my little peeves and I guess just another thing that women don't understand about men.
If anyone could shine some light on this, I would be forever greatful.

Cheers...

Try to focus!

I have been creating and deleting blogs of mine for months now. I start to write something, and do it regularly for a couple of days and then just as quickly I forget about it and voila! weeks or even months go by that I don't write a thing. Now is the time for a change. I am going to commit to writing on the wall for as long as I am still alive. (ok, maybe that is a bit much but, nevertheless, I need to commit for a long time and if there is anyone out there that reads this, maybe you can give me a little 'nudge' if I happen to forget for a day or so.

How hard can it be? A few minutes out my day devoted to writing on a wall. Ha, something my parents always frowned on and now I can do it all I want. Sometimes it's fun being an adult.

You will find many different things on this blog. I don't want to focus on any one subject. Just a free for all. I see many out there that are related to child care, or writing, or beer, who cares, there are numerous types of blogs but for me, it's a just that, writing on the wall. Anything that comes to mind. Unedited and uncensored. Ok well probably a little censored but I will try to be real and free, as that is how we should be, as long as you don't cross the lines to illegal, inappropriate or what have you. Free to be me! Maybe that's what I should have called this blog.

Cheers...